Travel in the soft spring snow had been slower than we had expected. With an hour of climbing remaining to the summit it was becoming clear that we were going to spend the night on this rocky summit ridge. With darkness settling around us we made ourselves as comfortable as we could on a small flat spot. Although it was early in our mountaineering careers, we dug warm coats, hats, extra food, and headlamps we had brought along out of our packs. We had recently filled our water bottles at a rock seep and had two full water bottles. Sitting snuggled together on our empty packs we settled down for a chilly night. I dozed off and on, back leaned against the rocks, as the brilliantly clear constellations spun their way across the inky sky dome. We talked about our lives so far, our dreams for the future. Eventually the eastern sky began to lighten, and we completed our traverse of the mountain.
Later that day as I hiked along the sun-dappled trail far below the summit my thoughts touched on the concept of choice. I had chosen that climb knowing it would challenge us, while believing I had the experience to handle it. I’d had to dig a little deeper into myself to deal with the unexpected night out on the mountain. It was a little scary, yet I had done it well. What I hadn’t done was devolve into blaming each other, spend time whining that this ‘shouldn’t have happened’, or spun into self-deprecation about what a poor mountaineer I was. Not that these thoughts and feelings didn’t try to sneak in, but I knew that doubt and self-criticism would not help in us get through the night safely, and chose to focus my energy elsewhere.
Do unexpected events show up your life? They do in mine. Do I always handle them with such clear and focused action? No. I have made many poor choices in my life, and they have cost me years, and friends, heartache, and confusion.
I have been a slave to perfectionism. I have made decisions in order to gain others’ approval in hopes of enhancing my flagging self-worth.
These choices resulted in difficult and dark times in my life where I felt overwhelmed, exhausted, and out of control.
Fortunately, just like that night spent on that cold, rocky height, those years gave rise to change and wisdom. I learned to slow down, to shed the overwhelm, and instead connect deeply to my talents, gifts, and to what truly matters to me.
Now I have happiness, fulfillment, self-confidence, and peace. Relationships that were strained during my years of struggle are now honest and vibrant. I am grateful to do work that I love.
In my program Live From Your Essence you reap the benefits of my many “be-nighted” experiences. I’ve been there, so you don’t have to.
Are you confused about what is your summit and the actions to take to reach it? Do you wish to transform from the unexpected events in your life, instead of fear them?
The work I do will help you identify your summit and reach it. Reaching inner and outer mountain summits is my passion and my life journey. Come join me, on your journey.